The Exercise Pain

If you have not exercised since Thanksgiving and then you decide to exercise for several days in a row at the end of December, you might be in pain for several days following that.  Just a little sage advice to start your new year.

The Perfect Jewish Christmas

• Sleep In


• Play rummikubs over brunch


• Lunch at Chinese restaurant


• Drive around looking at everything that is closed


• Two hour Chinese food induced coma


• Bake Cookies together (while listening to the ipod on shuffle)


• Light the Menorah, because it is a rare instance when Chanukah starts on the 25th


• Watch a Movie (The 40 Year Old Virgin)


• Snuggle up and read


• Back to bed

Tennis in Florida

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the apartment complex, nobody was stirring, except Mike and Anne, who went to the tennis courts and lobbed some good shots.  Florida in winter is fine.

The Shopping

Recently I had the horrific experience of finding myself in a Wal-Mart super-center.  In the toy aisle.  Surrounded by lots of parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles buying lots of stuff.  Apparently there is a “give me stuff” holiday coming up and super walmart’s shelves are overflowing with toys that make me pause.  I found myself frozen, highly alert, watching the people while simultaneously categorizing the toys in my head.  My fascination with the gender specificity of toys was equaled only by my new interest in the link between the toys and over-advertised TV shows.  The packaging is so overdone and so gender specific.    The people just kept piling them into their cart; the kids just kept asking for more.  My heart ached.  Misbehavior, mistreatment, neglect, irritation, frustration, screaming, slaps on the ass, surrounded their carts filled with all these toys.  My eyes widened as I felt overwhelmed with despair.  I nearly had a panic attack in the toy aisle of the Wal-Mart.  And I wouldn’t have been at all out of place.

My sadness stayed with me as I stood in line, waiting for Mike to find saran wrap.  And then I heard the little boy behind me stomp his feet and tell his dad how much he hated this day and how much he wanted whatever it was that he did not get.  Dad stood with the youngest boy in his arms, clutching a very girl looking doll.  I stared.  The middle boy squatted on the floor trying to open the ants in my pants game that he was getting.  And the oldest boy, with the stomping feet, stood nearby with a very age appropriate game of “Guess Who.”  I waited for dad’s response.  He cleared his throat and said, “I know that you are not very happy.  I know that it was not a perfect day.  Not all days are perfect days.  I feel upset too when my days aren’t all that I want them to be.”  And just like that, my faith in people was revived by a family that not only picked through the rubble to find appropriate toys, but also talked to their children like civilized respected human beings.  And to top it all off, the youngest boys choice of a toy marketed to girls didn’t seem to even give them pause.  The middle boy asked if they were going to get candy, and the dad suggested sugar free gum, to which these grateful children applauded and cheered.

I started to drown in the Super Wal-Mart in Orlando, but was rescued by a family that never even knew I was watching them.  Mike chastised me for not saying something to the dad, giving him some sort of stranger support, and I wonder now if I should have.  

The No Smoking Light

Here’s my thought on airplanes.  Maybe instead of having that no smoking light that is always on, they should exchange it for a light that indicates when you can or can’t use your electronic devices.  I mean, come on, how long has it been since you’ve been able to smoke on a flight in the continental US?  They don’t have a no cell phone light up there, reminding you through the entire flight that you can’t use your cell phone.  Isn’t the purpose of the light to let you know when you can and can’t do something?  What is the point of having a light that stays lit the entire trip just to remind you that you can’t smoke?  Electronic devices, however, you can use during some portions of the trip.  How about a little light for the electronic devices?  Then when you are listening to your ipod or watching a movie on your laptop, you will know when it is time to turn it off.  As it is now, every time you hear a ding (if you hear it), you have to pause the music, and listen really closely.  Then, because your ears are stuffy and they don’t seem to instruct the pilot on how not to hold the intercom microphone directly onto his mouth, all you hear is, “Fank fou for ffffff flight.  We fwill ffdesent. . . ffturned offffand stowed.”  Then a bunch of people all with one of their headphones out look at each other and shrug their shoulders.  Next thing you know the steward person comes and admonishes everyone for not turning off their electronic devices and putting their seats in their upright position.  But thank god, that light was shining the entire way, reminding us not to smoke, so no worries there.  And just in case you’ve forgotten, it is a federal offense to mess with the smoke detectors in the bathroom.  Enjoy your flight.  

The Memorization

• 23 hours until torts exam


• I have mostly memorized the elements and special circumstances of the intentional torts: false imprisonment, trespass to chattels, trespass to land, intentional infliction of emotional distress, conversion, assault, and battery.


• I have mostly memorized the defenses and their nuanced application: Consent, self defense, defense of others, defense of property, recovery of property, necessity (public and private), authority, discipline, and justification


• I still have to memorize the biggest tort of all – Negligence – about ½ the semester.


• I am not so worried about application as much as I am worried about remembering it all. Memorization is not one of my strengths.


• Send your mental memorization strengths to me tomorrow from 1:00-5:00.

The Civ Pro Exam

I have no idea how I did on my civ pro exam. The exam seemed fairly straightforward, but I don’t honestly know how I did. You never know how you do on these exams, because how you did is plainly and simply only a measured against how everyone else did. If you saw more things, articulated more things then the others in the class, then you did well. If you saw less things, articulated worse than the others in the class you did poorly. It is the heart of the ranking system. You are only measured by your comparative performance to everyone else.

Since I last wrote, I’ve liked the idea more and more of opting out of this ranking process. It makes me feel like me again. I have no idea how it will play out because as I’ve talked about it, several friends have reminded me that you have to put your class rank on your resume and on every application you fill out. Additionally, some firms only interview those who fall within the top ten percent or the top twenty-five percent. It will be interesting to see how this all plays out.

In two days I take my next, last, and final exam for the semester: Torts. This is my only closed book exam, so the memorization begins now. I can’t say that I have ever understood the point of memorization exams. The day after the tort’s exam, I leave for 25 days in Orlando with Mike. Woooooo Hoooooo!

The Ideals

I think I am almost recovered from yesterday’s contracts exam, and now I have 47 hours until my civil procedure exam. The layout of the exam was two 1.5 hour essays and 1 hour of multiple choice. I had a lot of trouble with my time and felt very rushed. It’s hard to keep going straight for that long. It takes a lot out of you. The contracts exam really affected me. I felt really let down afterwards. I realized that I missed three issues: damages ascertainability and avoidability and a liquidated damages provision. What sucks is that if I had seen them I could have written about them and probably would have done well on the exam. But I did not even see them. You can’t get any points for what you don’t include. I wish that I hadn’t talked about the exam afterwards so my confidence would have stayed up and I would have immediately started studying civ pro. Instead I cried a lot and psyched myself out. I’m probably making a bigger deal about these issues then they are. But I won’t have any idea until January 6.

It’s been making me think more and more about the impact of these grades. I read an article about Law School being like Junior High, but instead of it being about what your peers think, it is about what your class rank is. I kind of feel like that. Last night a lot of my self worth was wrapped up in how I did on a four hour exam because that will be the outward expression of me and what I have learned in the first semester of law school. Today, I have been letting that go and remembering that I know that I have learned a great deal. That if I missed three issues on an exam that is not reflective of the big picture. I understand and can articulate the concepts.

I keep thinking about what I would tell a child in this position. I would tell them to ignore the class rank. I am trying to hold on to those ideals. I am trying to hold on to the non-competitive (rule 8a) me. It is very hard. I have a few ideas boiling in my brain, though. I don’t know whether I will be able to go through with them though. I start first with my ideal that my class rank should not be a reflection of my self worth. If I believe this, then does what my class rank is matter? Not really, as long as I pass. I feel pretty confident that I passed. So, really there is no need to know further. If I am happy with what I have learned why does anybody need to know how I scored.

When I first started thinking about this, I thought that I would not share with my law school friends. So far, sharing with handful of people has been a disaster anyway. My score has been higher than their scores and then I just feel guilty about doing better and worrying and complaining with them. They don’t like it either. Then I started thinking that perhaps I didn’t need to share with my friends and families either. I mean, if they think I am learning and growing why do they need to have a number that again only reflects a four hour exam? That’s when I realized that maybe I don’t need the number either. If I truly believe that the score is not reflective of me then it shouldn’t be reflective of me whether it is high or low. I imagine at some point, I will have to write it on some application, but what would happen if I didn’t get it until then? I don’t imagine I have the willpower to withhold this information from myself, but I have until January 6 to figure it out.

This is where I am – This class rank number is not reflective of me. This class rank number is not reflective of what I’ve learned. The hardest thing about ideals is that you have to hold onto them even when you want to let them go. That is you can’t celebrate your class rank/ score when you do well, but say that it is not reflective when you don’t do well. My true belief, whether my score or rank is high or low is that it is not a worthy measure of all that I am.

THE TESTS

So you may have noticed that I’ve dropped off the radar. That is because we are about to begin THE TESTS. I have been pulling 12-13 hour days since thanksgiving, preparing for THE TESTS. I can’t remember ever feeling pressure like this in my life. Honestly. It all comes down to THE TESTS. THE TESTS determine 85 – 100 % of your grade. THE TESTS are all curved. Real live curves. Like the only way you know how you did is by comparing how much better or worse you did then 75 other people. And then you get this little number called your class rank. Everything from here on out is based on your class rank: interviews, scholarships, etc. They tell you that you can still get a job with a low class rank and then in the next breath they tell you that the only way to keep your options open as to which kind of job is to keep your class rank high. How do you do that? There is only one way. Score well on THE TESTS. When is somebody going to move the standardized testing debate to law school? I could literally fail out of law school and be told not to come back next semester based on my four hour performance on THE TESTS. That’s four hours on Wednesday, three hours on Saturday, and four hours on Tuesday. I know that failing out is a possibility, because we have two people in our class who failed out last year. I’ve talked to them. They thought they were doing fine. They thought they understood the law. Then they took THE TESTS. Then they got a letter in the mail, saying maybe you should consider another career or at least wait a year and start all over again.

Take all your positive law school exam thoughts and center them on ME tomorrow Wednesday at 1:00. (Unless you’re in my class, in which case you better be spotting issues)